Tag: Communication
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Decisive, Fast, Intense. At a cost.
You’re decisive, you move fast, and you don’t make random changes just to make someone feel better. That’s not aggression — that’s a builder’s mindset. It’s the same energy that makes you good at what you do. It means your driven. You’ve seen what doesn’t work, and you don’t like wasting time toying with what…
Creating Content, But not creating it.
Whether you’re an educator with a blog, a traveler with a vlog, or a business owner with a website, there are times when you need to create content. Express your thoughts, communicate your message, and impact your audience. However, you don’t have to always create. Creation is energy-intensive. It can be exhausting (usually after, not…
Anchor, Focus, and Align
My friends over in the Principals Masterclass (TJ Vari and Joseph Jones) taught an invaluable lesson on communicating with candor. In that lesson, they gave three concepts to use when giving feedback. These concepts also apply to communicating to a broader audience. Anchor. Focus. Align. We’ve been talking about story-telling this week here and again…
I’m Not A Cat, The Second Story
The I’m Not a Cat Zoom call is so relatable. It, in some shape, has happened to each of us. And the lessons are many. Regardless of the stories we tell, there’s always going to be a second story. The second story is the one our audience hears, and it could be vastly different than…
Story Telling
You have a story. Your team has a story. Your organization has a story. You are uniquely positioned to tell that story and craft that narrative. But if you do not tell your story, someone else will. While most stories are positive, if someone else is telling your story, it might have unintended negative consequences…
When Holding Back is a Mistake
Sometimes it’s timidity, sometimes fear. Occasionally it’s lack of skill, and usually it’s just trying to be nice – trying to maintain relationships. Because relationships matter, as you well know. Real trust isn’t built by avoiding hard conversations—it’s built by navigating them together. That’s why Dr. TJ Vari and Dr. Joseph Jones are targeting 9…
Masterclass Is Now Open!
This is a limited seating professional learning opportunity. It’s a Masterclass from Principals’ Seminar featuring authors, superintendents, and educational leaders TJ Vari and Joseph Jones. You should consider registering. Here’s why. Compassionate Candor Creates Success You have audacious goals. But the reality is – you’re never going to accomplish them without mastering the craft of…
With Feedback, Less is More
As with most things, less is more. This is especially true with communication, but not less quantity of communication (redundancy is good). Less words is more effective. Think of this. Your communication includes numerous aspects beyond words: Eye contact Body language Attitude The delivery Listening (not just to the positive parts) Tone of voice What…
3 Simple Questions For Returning Staff
Yes, there are unprecedented changes that your school may not be ready for. However, there are also simple leadership moves you can take to lead during these times of change. One of these leadership moves involves leading with questions. Here are three simple questions to ask your teachers as they return to school this year.…
Get to No First
When dealing with a difficult situation or a challenging conversation it’s tempting to find agreement quickly. Agreement is not the goal. The goal is understanding why there’s a difficulty. To achieve this goal, you must get to no first. Make it the first aim in your conversation to uncover the objection, which often sounds like:…
Uncertainty
Uncertainty – What is it? What can we do about it?
Communicating with Empathy: 3 Phrases to Use When Someone is Irritated
You could just pull rank. But that may not move you toward your vision. Instead, here are 3 things to say when someone is irritated. And yes, you should say something. Avoiding problems is a good way to create fester transfer, and that’s not good for culture. Instead, communicate with empathy using these 3 phrases.…
Confrontation and Candor
A confrontation is a clashing of forces or ideas. It’s not pleasant, and generally, we don’t like confrontation. And there’s a good reason for that. It’s just not healthy. However, avoiding confrontation is not the same as avoiding candor. Candor is open communication. It’s honest and frank. Candor can also be scary, but it is…
A Carpenter’s Belt for Principals
I remember growing up as my childhood home was being built. I loved watching the carpenters walk around constructing the walls and the cabinetry. They were like superheroes with all the tools and gadgets on their belts. The carpenter’s belt is a rugged piece of leather craftsmanship. Without it, I’d imagine the carpenter’s job would…
The Right Words
It’s not always the right motive or the right ideas that are needed. Sometimes it’s simply the right words spoken at the right time. Leadership is about understanding the other point of view and speaking the right words to move that point of view toward a goal. The wrong words can lead to unintended outcomes.…
Questions a Great Manager Asks
…and principals too. Because you are the manager of the school, and no, manager is not a bad word. How was your weekend? Would you like more or less support from me? Do I give you enough feedback? What’s your prefered way to get information about what’s happening outside your classroom? What are you currently…
Social Media
After collaborating with a friend who serves in district leadership, the question lingered: How are principals and school leaders utilizing social media over the summer to build engagement between their school and the community? I pose the question to you, and I’d love to hear what you’re doing. Considering sharing with me by leaving me…
When Narratives Collide
The topic of school culture has gained importance in the professional literature in the last decade. That’s a good trend. But we must always remember that no amount of imaging, branding, or social media activity can change the culture of a school. What is it then, that changes school culture in a positive way? Let’s…
Grandfather Clocks and Communication
My grandfather used to build, out of all things, grandfather clocks. I don’t know much about the craft, but I know the clocks he created were consistent. They ticked consistently, rang every hour, and at some consistent interval needed to be reset. Communication is a lot like a grandfather clock. Communication requires consistent intervals with…
This Is Getting Personal
Things become personal when there are inadequate processes or a lack of clarity. Have you heard these sentiments: I didn’t know your grade level was working on that! I didn’t know you wanted us to prepare that! You never told me you wanted… If you’ve had these conversations, you know that feeling. You might have…
3 Unhelpful Stances to Disagreement
I’m sure you’ll agree, disagreement happens. Often it can become a strengthening agent in a work relationship or on a team. Sometimes, disagreement can lead to toxicity at work. Here are three unproductive stances when dealing with disagreement: Resist: exhibited by behaviors such as intimidation, shame, and sabotage. Undermine: acts that decrease the credibility or…
They won’t read my emails!
It’s a problem, I know. Unlike a meeting, the campus mail, and a conversation, email is: Cluttered general reminders Filled with spam Cheap to deliver Void of human body language And maybe a few more reasons that make it a difficult platform for leading a school. But if you must communicate via email, and there…
What Type of Feedback Do Teachers Want?
In my research, which included 3,500 walk-throughs across three school districts, I learned there are four main types of feedback to give to teachers: Descriptive Feedback Reflective Feedback Corrective Feedback Affirmative Feedback Which type do teachers prefer? Which type of feedback do they want mostly? I was shocked to discover they have no preference. Each…
Can You Control a Conversation?
You can control a speech. You can control a meeting. You can control how much toothpaste is on your toothbrush. But you can’t control a conversation…not if it is to actually be a dialogue. Entering a conversation with a predetermined outcome will result in controlling behaviors. If you seek to advance your agenda, you will…
Risk, the other bottleneck
In the recent episode of the podcast (3 Communication Missteps), assumptions were a culprit. They were labeled bottlenecks. They stop the flow of communication. In the best of cases, they hinder communication. Risk is the other bottleneck. It’s not that you don’t know what to say. It’s that you feel it’s too risky to say…
Assumptions That Derail Communication
Communication gets the credit. Or should I say, blame? Yep, communication is the one always taking the blame, but in this case, it’s an unchecked assumption. Unchecked assumptions create conflicts where no conflict exists. Assumptions create tensions, and those tensions create bottlenecks where communication can not flow effectively. If the school culture is the engine…
Camo Words and Why They Matter
Kids often hide meanings into the words they use. They cover their real feelings because they don’t want the vulnerability. But if you listen, you might hear the real message. Instead of, “I don’t care!” You might actually hear the student say, “I really do care about what people think of me.” Adults also use…
Three Conversation Catalysts
The quickest way to shut down a coaching conversation is to offer ideas. Yes, it’s efficient, but it’s not effective. Instead, try one or all of these conversation catalysts: Paraphrase. “It sounds like you’re saying that you use ___ as a way to ___. How do you think that’s working?” Flipside. “On the one hand,…
Invisibility of Good Communication
In episode 7, communication was the ducting or pipes that carry the cooling agent through the engine of school culture. The analogy still stands, but now we look to the invisibility of good communication. Like cooling pipes in an engine, they’re unseen. No one opens the hood of the car and asks, “Hey man, can…